Sweetpeas Chats Vol. 2

 

Well, I think it's about time for another Sweetpeas Chats! If you don't remember what that is, its probably because the last time I uploaded one was in March 21st. Ironically, it was also after an Instagram "crash" but todays isn't directly related to yesterdays FB/IG Fiasco! I just feel like its time to get back to blogging.

September was not a good month, August was not a good month, and I took some time away from basically everything. I mean Youtube videos still went up, but I was not there if that makes sense. I did send out some emails of the course of the last month though so if you are an email reader of mine hopefully you enjoyed those, but overall I've been very distant from the "social media world" having only started posting again to Instagram just recently. So I thought its long over due to return here too.

Before I do so, I feel like we need to chat. If you follow me on Instagram, or like I mentioned earlier, are subscribed to my newsletter you already know happened. I always respect my families privacy and things online so I don't talk much about things that don't related directly to 25 Sweetpeas, but August was filled with a lot of sadness for my family, and just when I thought it was leveling out and starting to feel ok again everything got worse, and hit even closer to home so to speak. At the end of August Dixie, my four legged sister, my best friend, my everything passed away, after giving us so many wonderful years. Y'all are probably familiar with her, as I talk about her and reference her ALL OF THE time. She's been pictured here and on my Instagram a lot , and even in Youtube videos every now and then. She is literally everything to me. So as you can imagine, this has been an extremely hard. She's been apart of everything, for the past 7 years, and I am just so so thankful/grateful for her and feel so lucky to of had her in my life. She got me through so many things, and was always there for me, and I miss her every single second of the day.

The past year she has been battling End Stage Liver Disease, and Pancreatitis, and was the best little fighter through it all. She/We were very fortunate to have the last year with her, because when she was actually diagnosed, they basically gave her a matter of days. Thankfully we found a medicine that really helped her and a lot of the past year she was functioning like a puppy, and it was wonderful. Sure she had off days, and a very strict diet + meds to take but she was happy, and playing and spunky as ever. Unfortunately the medicine that was like the miracle medicine in her case, suddenly became really hard to find, and we noticed the decline without it, so I spent so much time daily trying to find it. No one could get it, not even vets, so we did what we could with other options, while searching. Actually the last blog post I wrote, I wrote after finally have gotten a version of the medicine. It was in the mail and I was starting to feel hopeful. It wasn't exactly what she needed but it was close and we all just hoped it would have helped while the supply caught up? Still not 100% sure why the medicine is only made by one company and why they aren't making it right now, but.... I just did a quick search and its STILL out of stock everywhere and no one is saying why. Ugh.. But anyway, the medicine didn't show up in enough time to help unfortunately. 

Ultimately I am so thankful for the extra year we were given to be together. She is extremely missed and not a moment goes by without me thinking about her. Y'all know she was apart of everything, and the past month has really been trying to navigate that. She taught me how wonderful life is with a four legged sister, and how special that connection is. I miss it so much, and do want to find that again some day. Sooner than later maybe, because life without kinda sucks in all honesty. I miss everything about having you in my life Dixie. I miss taking you out, you asking me for a paw massage, and wanting to play even if you want me to go get the ball, and you just chase me, I just miss EVERYTHING, I could go on forever!

Art has been really challenging lately. I think usually when I create I have to also be in a good happy headspace, or be inspired, and there certainly has been a lack of that. Plus I can often tell you about the time behind a piece, meaning I can/could say Oh I made that when xxx, and xx was happening, and lately that association hasn't been great, so I've like avoided it? Well mid September I finally picked up my pencil again, and the art is different. I became obsessed with clouds, and am still currently. I have been having a lot of fun with them. They have no rights/wrongs. They are unattached, the are often just based on what I saw in the sky that day, or a random picture from my camera roll, and lately its been my go to thing. I didn't really realize all of those things until this past weekend. It now makes sense. Earlier this year I was obsessed with interior art, and creating all of the lil details, and lately that's been hard for me, I wasn't sure why, but then I looked at them and it made sense. In practically all of them you can find Dixie. Not literally, but you may see a dog toy snuck in, a water bowl, etc, it just proves my point of she was/is apart of everything. Which can also explain why it was so hard to get back to that type of art. So while I do plan on doing that again, I am taking it day by day. Also every piece made last month, and on you will actually be able to find a paw print hidden in all new pieces that I create, Dixies paw print to be exact. I feel like it's a neat way to still have her be apart of everything, and even though its "hidden" I will know its there and it will make me smile. 

So needless to say, its been a hard few months, and I am sure it will continue. Some days are harder than others, and you never know what a day will bring. I thought today I was going to make some marketing for a Digital Christmas Card launch, and maybe I still will, but I just felt like I was being very "fake' until I sort of gave a bit of a life update. Also I read this blog post by The Daily Tay, and while its sad, SO sad, I feel like hey, I am not the only one who feels like this. So yeah, that's where I am, there are good and bad days, and I am starting to create art more, I am actually joining Peachtober! We will see how that goes! Maybe that will be the next Sweetpeas Chats, maybe I need to make them weekly? What do you think? Ok, I need to go write something happier, and then try to create something, so far today I have edited 3 videos, got them ready for Youtube and now I need to finish up this post, work on another, and like I said, try to create some art and finalize the details for the Custom Christmas Card Launch!